My stupidity

[Wednesday, 05 July, 2006]

It was a Wednesday, the day I would usually meet up with Vivi. However, I was jinxed this time that she had tuition in the evening and that we could not get to see each other. I got so jealous of her cousin who her mum made her go out with in the afternoon.

Just after I had set my aim to sleep and work on my website for the whole day, she gave me a call and asked if I wanted to meet up with her. It might sound ridiculous since we had only twenty minutes left before she had to rush home. I looked at the clock and informed her the time and she was shocked. I did not say anything and she presumed we should drop the idea of meeting; I was too lost for words. Just after we put down the phone, I decided I should take this chance to at least get to see her.

Since she was going home from Bugis, I planned to take the MRT at TG Pagar instead of walking to Outram Park directly so that I could get to see her earlier. At my speedy feet, I hurried towards the MRT station but the traffic was a nuisance. I could be tired or blinded that just before a fast incoming car passed by, I crossed the road and the opposite crossing pedestrians blocked my way to the centre curb, which stalled me from taking off from the tars area. There was no room for the thought of how much hatred those inconsiderate people had towards me as I picked up my speed again.

As the only escalator at that exit was under servicing, passengers were forced to take the stairs up, causing congestion. I was delayed a while as I took up my phone and gave a call to her. She did not pick it up and I retried more than four times and finally lost my concentration and slowed down.

I could not help feeling unlucky that she had already reached Outram MRT and that my plan to meet her earlier not only failed, but made me suffer a greater delay. The train went off right in front of me when I was holding on to the phone and I had to wait for another four minutes for the next train; I could have reached Outram MRT faster by walking there straight away. My frustration jeered at my stupidity and I hated myself for the wrong choice made. I could at least call her earlier to inform her that I could meet her at TG Pagar MRT station.

Right after alighting at Outram, I paced towards the Northeast line and met up with her. There was not much time left as she had to rush for her tuition and I could only walk her home. To the usual bus-stop near Chinatown, we cherished each other’s companion. It was only when seeing her I started to cool down and regain my calm.

She did not mind sacrificing her time to chat with me downstairs her house, having to rush more, but her siblings were unfortunately there too.

It was just my luck.

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