My New Girlfriend – Sony NEX F3

I have gotten myself a decent camera finally after many years of daydreaming. The credit goes to Weitat and Gin for accompany me to the showroom, especially Weitat for the special discount he has gotten for me.

My new girlfriend, Sony NEX F3, is a mirrorless camera, which ranges between a normal compact camera and DSLR. According to some reviews I have read online, newer versions of mirrorless cameras are equivalent to entry level DSLR.

Mirrorless cameras lose to DSLR in autofocus speed. This means that mirrorless camera users may not be able to capture moments as fast as DSLR users. As a user who has just upgraded from sub quality compact cameras and having a few touches of my friends’ DSLR, I find my Sony NEX F3 satisfying.

The thing I quite dislike about my new girlfriend, F3, is that it does not have a viewfinder. I do not like the feeling of having another person seeing what I’m exactly focusing on. Therefore, it strongly discourages me from capturing some great moments, people and especially eyes candies. After all, mirrorless cameras are designed to be used without optical viewfinder, hence, have smaller bodies.

The main reason I have chosen a mirrorless camera over DSLR is that it is much more portable given its size and weight. My brothers will be using it then, which makes purchasing of the camera more worthwhile. Other than that, the discount in price is a big bonus. Luckily, Canon has yet to come up with a mirrorless camera, otherwise I would have to make more comparisons.

I was, in fact, stuck between Sony NEX 5N and F3. NEX 5N is an improved version of NEX 5 and it has been out in the market for about a year. NEX 7 has recently being launched and is out of stock, but the price difference is far too high – around $600 to $700 more. My girlfriend, NEX F3, is new as well, however, is said to be a lower-end version of NEX 5N, which is around $200 cheaper.

– Resolution of images
NEX 5N is the winner despite NEX F3 is about a year newer. However, I do not need extremely high resolution images.

– Design
Both models look quite alike at first glance but NEX F3 looks more like a box, which is uglier. Looks of the camera is of a lower priority to me, just like a girlfriend, which nobody knows.

– Flash and external gadget
NEX F3 has a built-in flash, which is stronger than the external flash that comes with NEX 5N. I do not like attaching and removing of external flash. The main issue is that both cameras have only a connector for external gadget, including the external flash. Therefore, NEX 5N users may have problems attaching an external microphone in future for video taking, but of course, this is not a good example since you do not need flash when doing video shot.

– Price
As mentioned earlier on, NEX F3 costs around $200 cheaper.

– LCD
Both cameras depend solely on the LCD for phototaking. Both of their LCDs can be adjusted. NEX 5N’s screen can be adjusted to face downwards more, so that the user can hold the camera higher and still be able to view the screen. NEX F3 can instead, flip the LCD screen 180 degrees to face the front, so that the user can take self portrait. Both are useful but I think the latter is more useful for causal shooting, especially with friends.

The Sony salesman, Jose, was a very honest man. He did not persuade me to buy NEX 5N, which was the more expensive model. Instead, he advised me to get a camera as accordingly to my need. He did his work professionally such as showing me how to attach the external flash and the power of them. He also reminded me that NEX F3 was very new and thus there would be fewer online reviews about it, which could be the reason why I felt NEX 5N was much better.

I love my girlfriend – Sony NEX F3.

Photography has been my hobby since young. I may not be very good in it but I put in extra effort than most people to make sure my photos turn out better. I wish to capture all the greatest moments and people of my life, and bring out their best smiles in my unique angle. I want to be appreciated through my work and not words.

I hope I can get some models and improve on my photography skill for photoshooting.

Fell Sick for a Month

Not many people would believe that I have a rather weak body. Taking too much “heaty” food would take me down, other than being very upset. I usually feel thirsty even though my water bottle is always near me.

I was down with sore throat, cough, flu, diarrhea, and probably some fever almost a month ago. I went to the TCM before all the pests arrived and the four days of good behaviour did not save me. Then, I had to force myself to visit the polyclinic because I was told that green phlegm meant that it was a virus infection. Green poo threatened me more.

I knew I could have recovered much earlier like usual but it was a different scenario this time. Within the first few days when the symptoms arrived, I was deeply upset over certain news that I had lost my determination to resist anything. It made me feel stuffy on my chest and I knew my conditions would be worsened.

It took me a few weeks to pull myself together after trying to accept reality. I was, however, very loaded with work that I could not have sufficient rest. Keeping myself occupied with work was quite a good way to numb myself anyway. Nevertheless, being in a bad shape had slowed down my work by a lot.

The dry cough after the phlegm was gone kept me companied throughout for at least a week more. I still went to the toilet twice or more times daily as a new routine, and there would be bad tummy-ache at least once.

It was until Thursday night, I felt healthy and managed to have a good volleyball game, followed by supper at McDonald’s with my elder brother and mum.

Battling against illness depends a lot on the mind and I know I should try to avoid recalling depressing stuffs.

再度失去了你

那一夜,雨后的天晴鼓起了热舞,我几乎不敢相信事实,你和我单独共享一夜美景。我看着你的笑容,刺疼了我的心。我离你曾经的快乐好远,心酸就仿佛夺走了我的生命。我要给你的好多好多,是整夜都给不完的幸福。

我知道他人都会笑我太傻,因为我病得不轻,走过的路仿佛都有我拖着的脚印,我仍然为你前往。毕竟这是我梦寐以求的一夜,就算要我趴着、滚着,就算天崩地裂,我都会撑着去见你。

我是最幸福的人。我终于可以和你长时交谈,而能帮你减轻你的委屈是我的快乐。那一夜我盼望着路会更长、时间会停止。

可是就在那一夜,我们开着玩笑时我终于发现了我早已失去了我的生命力。我沉默了好几阵子,你也似乎没留意到我的哀伤。这突如其来的剑好锋利,刺穿了我的心。

我不愈的病加重,而那说好已麻木的心却哭了出来。一个简单的问题,我却要十多公里后才开得了口。那是我半年前的预测,如今却还是难以收拾这沉重的心情。再度失去的悲哀无法用言语来表达,遗憾在我心上刻了永恒的疤痕。因为当初没更努力,我终于学会了后悔。

就在每个漆黑的夜晚我会更想念,回味我们吵吵闹闹、口不对心的暧昧,因为这一切是我最快乐和珍惜的时光。和你交谈时的顺畅,不需要掩饰,更不用提防,绝对无人可取代。

祝福的话我开不了口,伤心也说不出嘴,只有心中期盼着他能给你真正的快乐。憔悴里千百个不愿意最终只能希望你在快乐和悲伤时都会想起我,因为无论在何时或何处,我都会义不容辞地捍卫着你。

Words are Cheap but They still Rule Eventually

People who know how to create opportunities are usually the winners.

There are too many things I feel are hypocrite to do and thus I’m avoiding them. I’m a person who does not over-promise and I believe actions will prove everything.

I think I’m right yet I’m very wrong in another aspect that there may not even be a chance for me to display my sincerity.

Girls love the feeling of being wooed but how many guys can cherish them for long after winning their hearts?

Promises of never-ending loves always come too early and I have yet to lie about it in my entire life; I do not promise things that I’m not certain about yet.

Words are getting cheaper everyday, yet many people continue to buy them.

The world leaves no room for losers but I will struggle to stay alive just to see her being happy.

Happy Father’s Day

Be glad if you are able to celebrate Father’s Day with your dad. I do not have the chance and not anymore.

He was a drinker, gambler and smoker. My dad had numerous bad habits but nothing could beat his love for the family. He and my mum gave me what I had today.

I started my life in a very poor family. At least, I did not have to starve, except for a certain period of time when he was already not around. He took us out for dinner during weekends despite losing money in his gamble sessions and he had never failed to give us money for school stuffs. He got drunk but he did not abuse. He smoked but he kept the cigarette smoke away from us.

The most unforgettable recollection of him was when he was on his hospital bed, asking me if my elder brother and I had pocket money. Would you be worried like him over such little thing when you are suffering badly and about to lose your last breath?

Although he may not be the best dad on earth, he has certainly done his part.

It has been more than ten years since my dad has passed away. None of us has ever forgotten him. We do not cry and in fact we joke using him. A simple teasing of “Are you missing lao ba (father)?” can be heard occasionally. None of us would admit it.

It seems like pretending to stay strong is not the best way to handle things because the tears of saddest can multiple, such that sometimes when nobody is watching, drops of them can overwhelm the eyes.

If you still have a dad, be really happy about it.

A Crazy Night

Sometimes, I do crazy things without thinking when there is no time to even hesitate. I hate to give up chances, which I have been doing. The usual thought “how many ten years’ do we have” has been emerging in my brain a lot.

I held my bladder and dashed through the late night of the crowded town area where people stared at my semi formal attire. I slowed down to look at the map but my heavy head refused to tell me how to use it. I continued in my half drunk state, into the darkness at the unfamiliar place. I was very uncertain of the direction. I had never thought of giving up but I prayed hard to have more time. I did not mind suffering longer as sweat began to drench me and I just wished to get to the correct location. The road names gave me fears and I began to doubt my judgment of the direction. It took me great courage to move on when I did not get any text reply. I saw hope when I finally saw the correct road sign but the bus-stop was empty. I dragged on my weary feet and proceeded but the next destination along the same road damped my short-lived happiness. It appeared to be a never-ending road, which I pressed on.

I reached in the nick of time. There was so much for me to celebrate about. It was one of the most memorable and dramatic stories of my life even though I puked and landed myself with bruises on my hand. Then, I realized my calf muscles had long given up on me. I was nervous and too loss on words, but I felt great.

It was not a story about a prince on a white horse but a smelly chap slightly better than being barefooted. There was probably no charisma or a heroic feeling with the shabby looks, but that was far beyond a normal guy could do.

I tried hard and I did well, but the initial goal might be just wrong that I ended up posing problems to everyone.

My Buddy’s Best Buddies

I have been thinking a lot about friendship over the past few days. I have made many great friends through schools, sports, national service, work and Internet, but my life seems to be empty somehow.

There are many friends whom I trust a lot and I’m prepared to sacrifice for them any time, and there are many who have already benefited from me. I believe in giving rather than receiving but there is always one part of me that is always pinning hope to get something in return; I am not a saint and I just hope to be appreciated.

Friends who have bothered to observe me should at least know that they can trust me fully, whether to keep secrets or to do my best in helping them. I’m proud of myself all these years.

The main doubt I have in mind is whether the friends whom I consider as my best friends would consider me as their best friend as well.

After all these years, how many friends would actually put me in their top 10 friends list?

If a friend has 10 tickets to a show, will I be the eleventh person to be left out of the group?

How would you feel when you assume your buddy would announce you as his buddy until he makes it clear at the most crucial time just some weeks after you have even done him a very great favour that nobody else would probably do? If this is not hurtful enough to you, think about your buddy having you in mind whenever he needs help.

Reality is cruel and most people would never notice little things that you have been doing. You can be nice to your group of friends by saying “yes” to all outing without even questioning “who are going?”, so that the events would proceed. You can always walk at the back to observe everyone to make sure none of your friends feels left out. There are many tiny things you can do help others silently, which none would ever notice.

I have a group of good friends who are willing to send me home by making a big detour despite being tired at night after having a long day; I also have another group of friends who would gather just to celebrate their birthdays and they can even arrange to celebrate belated birthday on my birthday itself. There are different groups of friends I have never wanted to abandon.

But I’m really tired of being the odd-one out whenever someone has to be sacrificed just because I’m easygoing and not ambitious at all. I have to repeat that reality is really cruel because soft people would always be sacrificed. If you are one, your friends would probably feel very sorry towards you but it does not make your life any better. What is the point of saying sorry when you have to repeat it times and times again?

It seems like I need a change in my life and stop bothering about friends since I have not even worked hard enough to improve my own life.

I Need to Blog

I’m seriously ashamed of myself for not blogging for long. Life is never the same as before and I have to neglect some hobbies sometimes.

Ever since I have started working on my tuition agency website, things have changed a lot. I’m a one-man-show for most of the back-end work. After more than a year, it does look like a professional website, but there are many features I have yet to implement or improve on. I have to worry about SEO and spend lots of time on them every week and eventually the daily boring administration work almost turns me berserk.

I’m also working on quite a number of blogs as well, which are either non-profitable or can earn me money in future. There is also a blog for the tuition agency. This makes my personal blog insignificant compared to them. My contents are also diverted to the blogs.

After all, my time management is really bad. It is not that I’m working 24 hours everyday but I’m always drained and thus operating at a lower speed.

It is definitely good to keep my blog running because it is one of the best ways to relieve my stuffed brain. I rarely get in touch with people and it is bad to keep things within myself, especially my frustration.

However, apart from having lack of time, people around me do give me problems as well. I’m not able to type whatever is in my mind sometimes because I have readers who are stalking my friends. Some people with lower EQ can also quote me out of texts to create problems for me. After all, many things have hit my motivation hard.

Another demoralizing thing is that my plan to move my blog from BlogSpot into my personal domain has stalled for very long. Somehow, I’m quite greedy that I want to keep my existing layout and structure, such that I would need to spend time learning how to edit WordPress template. Recently, updating WordPress for some of my blogs have also given me problems.

I have been tweeting a lot, which auto forwards the statuses to my Facebook, but the limited characters are pathetic. I have tried to forward the tweets over to my blog automatically through Hellotxt but it has shamefully failed me.

I’m a person full of thoughts but I do not have the chance to express myself freely. Blogging is almost the only way for me to become myself. Although it allows people with not-so-good intention to find out more about what is happening around me, it also allows people who are truly concern about me to show their support.

I’m always curious who will still bother to read my blog after so long of idling.

On the Verge of Collapsing

Life has become more unpredictable than ever since the beginning of this year.

My younger brother and I were always at loggerheads when we were young. He has, however, grown up to become a very sensible person and we become very close.

As I have been putting stress on myself without taking much rest, I am prepared to die of brain cancer or similar illness at a young age. I used to think that I can depend on him to take care of my mum when I am gone.

When he notified me that his body was acting weird, I was lost.

A few days later, when he returned from Bali, we went straight to the Accident and Emergency (A&E) department of Singapore General Hospital (SGH). It was one of my most hated places. Scenes over there were nasty, especially when I had to witness foreigners crying over to the lost of their friend.

Half of my brother’s body was experiencing numbness on the right side and it seemed like needles were poking him. Doctors and nurses began to get worried after they conducted X-ray and CT scan. Initial finding was either brain bleeding or blood clot, as we were told different stories by the staffs.

I had to lie to my gullible mum that my brother went over purposely just because he had bought travel insurance and wanted to make full use of it. My acting skill excelled as I remained calm in front of my mum even when my brother was admitted to the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). Perhaps, his condition was not so critical at the moment but it happened that the high dependency (HD) ward was full and he had to be admitted inside the more critical ward.

When my relatives started to find out about my brother’s condition, I had to answer them on the phone besides my mum, pausing for a few seconds to suppress the urge to burst out, before explaining in a relaxing tone. That was what grown-ups had to learn to do.

There was no feeling of festive season. I was glad enough that we could get time-off for him to go out for our reunion dinner. My brother was hospitalized until the second day of Chinese New Year. We did not manage to see the doctor in charge to ask about his condition. We were also disappointed with the management of the hospital.

My brother needs no medication at the moment and we are all clueless about what will happen next. His illness is likely to be “Post Thalamic Syndrome” as researched online. I cannot imagine myself feeling the numbness over half of my body symmetrically and boiling over my leg occasionally.

I’m beginning to feel numb as well. Staying alive is mainly to face hardship. My work alone has already taken away half of my smiles.