The Space to Start Family, Not Sex

I was having dinner with Jake’s mum together with my mum and younger brother on Wednesday when she asked me why I did not get a girlfriend.

At first, I told her I could not get any. Later, I admitted to her that some of the main problems were due to lack of time and financial stability, and that my house was small.

Her response was that it did not matter even if my house was very crowded because I needed not to bring my girlfriend home to do business when I was in a relationship.

I was stunned and embarrassed as my brain went into a daze. For some time until we changed topic, I had forgotten my initial reason.

It was not about the space for sex I was talking about, but the future.

If I were to have a girlfriend and we decide to get married one day, we would need countless bidding for a new BTO flat that is “affordable” (my foot!). It would then take at least three years for the flat to be built and be ready.

No, I would not want to get a resales flat in the ridiculous open market and live in greater debt.

The rich people who always pretend to sound puzzled over why the birthrate in Singapore is falling badly are responsible for the downfall. People hate them for good reasons.

I would never want any girl to suffer with me. People may argue that a girl who is worthy of my love would not mind suffering with me but I would still leave things to fate before I am confident of taking care of another person.

There is No Place Called Home

One of the greatest fears at home is when my younger brother brings his friends back to stay overnight.

I welcome visitors and so does my mum, and I’m sure all of us love that atmosphere, but it is impossible to adequate more people in the 3-room flat. One thing is that the visitors consist of both genders.

If you happened to see my MSN nick a couple of months back regarding the need to find a place to rent, that was when my younger brother brought his friends back and my elder brother’s girlfriend came as well. When both rooms were occupied, I had to sleep on the dirty and messy living room’s floor.

It is not about immatureness but the efforts to spare thoughts for people in your surroundings, and especially towards your family members.

Together with the daily irritation and distraction in the house, I feel like moving out at times. Of course, my financial situation does not allow. Frankly speaking, I cannot survive without my mum.

The house is left behind by my dad and none of us has worked for it; and thus I do not think any of us has the right to inherit it fully. I hope both my brothers are working towards getting their own houses in future like me, but meanwhile, spare more thoughts for all family members.

In fact, I’m always hoping that my flat will be enblocked so that we might be given a new flat with three bedrooms, but it seems impossible in near future because the government is still trying hard to upgrade the thirty years old flat and its surrounding area.

For those who own your own bedroom, please cherish your freedom and privacy, and your comfortable bed.

Banked in AdSense’s Cheque

[Wednesday, 02 May, 2007]

Nothing was unusual about this morning and I managed to go to bed at around 4.30am. I was then waked up by my mum at around 2pm.

It was not a usual day after all. My mum brought home a letter from Google AdSense and inside hosted the cheque, which seemed to have waited for me so eagerly. This aid came in handy. It was my second time receiving it but the first time my mum was able to help me cash it into my bank account; the previous time they sent me from the America and I got them to cancel the cheque, and currently still waiting for them to credit the amount back into my account.

Therefore, I have proved wrong to those people who have seen me staying online the entire day and assuming I’m very free. Although my progress may be slow sometimes due to distraction, such as television, Friendster and MSN, I do work. I do play games but I spend more time on work.

This afternoon, I continued with my work until evening time when I set off to Bukit Batok. I met up with Mingfa at the MRT before approaching Mr Khin’s flat. Kelly was waiting at the same void deck and when the co-broke agent arrived, Mingfa and I quickly went up to prepare the house.

Kelly was intending to let Mingfa do all the talking but he was not really prepared. Since I was not wearing as formal as him and that I was dehydrated and felt uncomfortable on my throat, I did not do anything. The co-broke agent in fact did most of the talking and I was quite impressed that he could relate so much things on the first visit.

Kelly went home after that and the buyers were actually quite interested. Mingfa and I went downstairs to wait for the second group of viewers. We waited for more than half an hour and finally they called Mingfa. Just as we were at the void deck, we saw the same pair of couple who were with the co-broke agent an hour ago. Mingfa got very pissed but I knew clearly it was the couple’s fault for they should not have engaged the agent while looking for flats by themselves; the silliest thing was they did not suspect it was the same flat in the first place.

We left immediately. Mingfa was intending to have a jog with Wilson and if only I was staying near them, I could join them in the healthy lifestyle. I wanted to have my own jog as well but when I reached home, I was welcomed by KFC chicken. I decided to have a midnight jog but later on, my stomach played me and I continued with eating again.

Room for Rent at Jurong East

[Wednesday, 18 April, 2007]

It was another relaxing night again. I had some games of Condition Zero with my elder brother and then caught the soccer match between Manchester United and Sheffield Wednesday United, which the champion scored two goals against nil. I went to bed at 5am.

I was waked up by phone calls again and when I finally got up, I was very disappointed to see the shares price dropping badly. I was not sure how much longer I could hold anymore.

I gave a call to Grace, Kaven’s banker, but she sounded like I should not be calling her in place of Kaven to get the address of the law firm. I knew my responsible as an agent but she seemed so unprofessional. In the end, she told me she would get the lawyer to call Kaven instead and I was glad to put down the phone. I was quite furious of her attitude but later on when I told Kaven about it, he said the lawyer had called him the day before but he did not tell me.

Afterwards, Grace from ERA called me regarding the Lorong Ah Soo flat. She said Kelly had agreed to meet her client at 11am on Saturday but Kelly was not free to go and I would go instead. Since Grace told me that was just a friendly reminder, I was expecting Kelly to call me about it but she did not. I began to feel disappointed.

Joshua called me in regards of rental of flats for his friend but when I asked Jianhao about a Choa Chu Kang one, he told me the owners had rented it out, which made me feel so insecure about the entire listing; it would reflect so badly on me if some tenants were to want to view a room but ended up it was already rented out. However, he told me there was a new listing at Jurong East, next to Wilson’s house.

Feeling so disappointed with my project and the rental thing, I had a few games of Condition Zero to relax myself. At night was all boring works.

Viewing At Bukit Batok and Volleyball at Shuqun Secondary

[Thursday, 12 April, 2007]

I was able to catch my sleep at 5am and my mum waked me up for my half boiled eggs at around 10am. I continued my beauty sleep till afternoon and waked up to see my shares price falling. It was a terrible sign for my plan to survive on it with this little income seemed bearish.

I went to Bukit Batok for the viewing. I was not able to contact Kelly and Mingfa replied me slowly. I did not have the contact number of the first viewer and not even his or her name. And if the two viewings were to crash due to time conflict, I would not know how to entertain both parties.

It was when Jingkun called me, I realised Mingfa would most probably not be able to rush down. I would not have minded if things were organised properly but I knew nothing completely. When I was feeling lost, Kelly suddenly arrived and told me her ear piece was spoilt and that was why I was unable to contact her. She was caught in the traffic jam and her clients were late as well. The person who called Mingfa to arrange for the appointment was probably just a hoax.

The viewing was dragged and the feedback was not good about the flat because whoever the designer for Bukit Batok area really sucked to the core for place two flats so near to each other; who would want to open his room’s windows to let the opposite front facing flat resident have free show everyday? That was a big turn off.

I could have rushed over to Shuqun Secondary earlier if not for the chat near the void deck. Kelly was informing Mrs Khin about the clients’ offer and we only left after 8pm. I took bus 187 over and it was exactly four bus-stops away like what Jingkun had told me. I took the longer route over to the main gate. I almost could not make it again for the bloated stomach made me feel so uncomfortable.

A man was standing there and did not notice me at all until I closed the gate quite hard. Later I realised he was the guard who showed me the way in but probably was just trying to see if I was going to the volleyball court.

By the time I got there, they had already played two matches and I was so disappointed. Before the end of the third game, Mingfa asked me to warm up. Then, I got to play as subset. My first ball at the main spiker’s position flew down and scored point. My next touch of the ball was blocking at number two and managed to stop opponent’s attack. Just as they were teasing that I was “100%” for that night, I could not serve the ball over. Our team played very well with two SQS players due to absence of Wilson. This time, we had Andy with us.

After the games, we went to Jurong East Central for dinner. I did not want to worsen my stomach and thus did not want to eat anything. Jingkun was either very kind or very hungry or perhaps both, that he offered to share a plate of carrot cake with me.

Just as I was returning from the stall, I saw a pair of shameless couple. The guy was caressing the girl’s thigh so obviously at the coffee shop. Some time later, I looked over there accidentally and saw the girl caressing the guy’s back. Jingkun saw the guy took some food and kissed the girl immediately. I presumed the couple stayed very near the coffee shop such that they were able to ease their needs immediately after dinner.

There was also a cute girl with a guy whom Weitat claimed was good looking. She was doing the ordering of food and drinks while the guy was sitting down there like a boss. The way she walked and twisted her body was sexy. When Weitat joked that the guy was lame, I actually believed him for I did not expect such guy existed.

We left at 11pm. I was expecting Kok Chiang to “send” me home as he was going back to camp at the east side but he took a cab instead of train. I was with one of the Clementi ITE guys who looked very quiet but he alighted shortly at Clementi and I had to bear the extremely unpleasant smell of an average sized bangala who sat one seats away from me, but was in fact taking up two seats. I was teasing him until Clementi that he had just worked as gigolo and thus he could not close his thighs.

It Was Not My Fault That I Could Not Doze Off

[Wednesday, 11 April, 2007]

It was such a rare day that I went to bed at 2am but unfortunately failed to doze off. It could be due to factors like my mum was packing her wardrobe at such weird hour, causing series noises, and that I had to sleep on the bed where the air conditioner attacked me directly. My stomach was giving me some uncomfortable feeling as well and that even after exercising, I could not sleep. My eyes were very tired but even closing them my brain could not stop working.

I finally got up after 5am. My brother returned home soon and reported the news of Man Utd thrashing Roma 7-1. I went to bed after 7am. I was waked up by my mum at around 10am to eat the half boiled eggs that I had ordered. Subsequently, calls waked me up.

I had a weird call from Zijun’s personal assistant (PA). The day before, he told me that we could collaborate on some work and he would ask his PA to contact me later in the day, which she did not. This morning, she told me she was going to arrange an appointment for Zijun with me, just simply for half an hour. I thought she was supposed to tell me what was the plan but she sounded I was going to “invest” in that financial company. Since Zijun was involved in MLM and other stuffs but my only interest (in fact I detest MLM) was based on web development, I was not very interested about meeting him up for such business other than to catch up. I told her we would arrange on some other time but she did not seem to want to put down the phone and thus I told her to call me some other time. I was in fact too tired to figure out what was happening and was intending to wait for Zijun to online to clarify things with him. Luckily, she did not call me back again.

Jianhao gave me a good piece of news that there was response from the flyers we pasted at Redhill and there was viewing at night. Later on, Kelly called and told me someone wanted to view Mr Khin’s flat at almost the same time as well and I had to tell her I was not free. She could not contact Mingfa and sounded a bit frustrated.

I went to Redhill in the evening, reaching almost right at time, which was 6.45pm. I called Jianhao but he was only at Clementi. When he arrived with two ladies to view the room, he told me he was meeting the landlord at 7pm and I realised I should have slow down my pace so much instead of rushing over from the bus-stop. When I thought everything was going smooth, the girl who was going to rent the room told us that her boyfriend was paying for the rental as well and the owners had claimed earlier that they only want a female tenant because they did not want anything to happen. Jianhao’s friend should have explained it earlier such that we would not waste the trip down since it was impossible.

Jianhao and I had our dinner at the Redhill market. I had chicken wing rice for $2.50 from the western food stall. Sugarcane drinks was nice with the lemon, but the small cup which cost $1.20 reminded me of the older days before the renovation, which I could get a very big cup with $1.

I followed Jianhao to Choa Chu Kang in the hope to learn some rental skill from him. There were supposed to be two viewings, which I thought was quite worthy of my time. The Indian tenants were late for half an hour and then we realised they had another viewing at Clementi afterwards. The other viewing was cancelled.

Jianhao sent me to the MRT station and I continued with my work with frustration of the slow computer.

The Bachelor and Viewing at Bukit Batok

[Sunday, 08 April, 2007]

Weitat was sending Jingkun, Junyang, Mingfa and I home when Elaine called him. However, he told her he was driving and put down the phone. Then, he told us that she was crying and we started asking him to park the car by the side of the road and call her back. Despite all the nagging around his ears, he refused to listen to us. In the midst of the journey, I finally gave up, feeling so disheartened and annoyed by his cold-heartedness.

As a friend, he should not have ignored her in the first place and moreover, they liked each other. Elaine was his ex girlfriend and they were together years ago. I was so delighted to know that they both still had affection for each other, except that she was attached now. Stories about her current boyfriend pierced me to want to patch Weitat and her up so badly.

He had his own reasons for things he did. At least, he did not want to be a third party now nor give any bad impression that he was showing affection for her when she was feeling down. If he was indeed like what he claimed, not a good boyfriend, he could at least try to be one; if you had tried, you might have succeeded but if you had never tried, you would definitely not succeed.

To me, he was wasting such a great chance and he was simply leaving her in the torch. He proved me once again that kind people were born to be losers.

The simple him and the sweet her were one of the couples whom I hoped could get together. I could bet that he could probably never get someone as sweet as her in future.

He was one of the most eligible bachelors in my group. Although he was not as cute as Wilson or as handsome and macho as Tze Khit, he could easily provide for a girl now with his family’s wealth and current stable job. Overall, he had nothing much to worry about.

Perhaps, he had not tasted much feeling of setback and thus he could not treasure relationship like Mingfa or me. He was a lucky guy, unlike me, but he let all the unimportant things overrode his feeling for her.

Upon reaching home and getting bathed, I started a special work. The morning was dedicated to Weitat. I did not blog nor continue with updating of my project, but instead, started to edit his photo taken with Elaine. It took me around six hours to complete it together with a website. The URL was benchmarked on the photo, which I uploaded into my Friendster account. Then, I submitted the photos to a few of our gang people and to his account as well. It was all for him that I slept only at after 7am.

Mingfa waked me up at around 2pm. My mum and younger brother began to continue packing the room again. I started my work and later, played a round of Condition Zero with my elder brother. Soon, I packed up to go to Bukit Batok.

Unfortunately, I had to bear with weird encounters on the train. Firstly was the smell of stinky feet even though I was standing by the side of the doors. Later, a weird Malay uncle was standing near me, right at the doors. His switching of hands to grab on the pole besides me every half a minute started to irritate me. Afterwards, he moved nearer to the seats and held on to the pole on my left side. Then, he started leaning towards the pole like kissing his girlfriend.

This time, the direct buyers went up to the house immediately and we were surprised since we did not give them the address. Mr and Mrs Khin received us with great hospitality again. Kelly let Mingfa handle the second viewer but he was not experienced enough. We were stunned when she wanted to leave soon. The comments were not good and I was quite disheartened.

Mingfa and I were supposed to have dinner together but we did not have much appetite and decided to go home straight away. By the time I reached home, the room was much neater.

Messy? A bit better though.

Recovering From Failure

[Tuesday, 20 March, 2007]

Halfway through my work, I was distracted by my elder brother to play Condition Zero game again. We stopped at 4am after a few rounds of reaction training. My brother started to catch the soccer replay between Manchester United and Middlesbrough while I continued to finish up my work. I joined him at the second half of the match to witness the only goal of the game. It was a penalty kick for Ronaldo. I preferred a normal scoring, which would be much more exciting.

Kelly waked me up at around noon and came over my house’s carpark to let me sign the OTP for Kaven. Afterwards, I continued with my beauty sleep.

It was pretty disappointing to witness the failure of my ten-bucks-per-day project. It was a secret and thus should not be mentioned. However, the dejection drove me to strive even harder and thus the entire day was spent on web designing. I did not even want to go out with my family for dinner.

During late evening, Chicken-tortoise called me again. Usually, most guys, excluding Gilbert, would be very happy when sweet girls ring them up but it was different for me this time. She was asking me to do translation for her again. She did not hang up the call immediately but since she was busy chatting with her China friends online, we did not talk much. She claimed that she did call me to chat before but I did not pick up her call. Within minutes, she ended our conversation.

Jessica messaged me and I felt quite embarrassed for not approaching her instead. I gave her a call before informing Kelly of the requirement of a flat.


[Thursday, 15 March, 2007]

Before I could realise, it was already near 5am. After waking up in the afternoon, I started my daily routine of clearing my emails. I was basically waiting for my mum to come back with my meal and also Kelly to message me the particulars of the buyers for the flats.

After she gave me the details, she sent me another message to ask if I would mind that she disband the group. It was unfair to her all along that Jenny, Mingfa and I were kind of dragging her since she was doing most of the work and that Jenny did not even appear once. Looking at the other angle, also mentioned by friends, Kelly was too busy to really teach us.

I did not finish my lunch and left home at around 3pm as I was afraid the HDB branch office would not wait for me. After reaching the office, I was a bit weary somehow. The two attachment students were at Regina’s counter and the cute one looked quite expressionless. However, I met Regina just outside the photocopier room and she was smiling so happily finally. I got down to a seat and quickly started filling up the Salutatory Declaration forms before going down to the HDB branch office.

This time, the reception counter was empty and I pressed for the queue number myself for the first time. There were three counters available and somehow my wish was granted and I was served by Mr. Ho again. He looked friendliest among the officers and was also most professional.

I went back to the office afterwards and helped Kelly to get an invoice from Winnie. It was then I realised I had keyed in the wrong number into my phone and that was why I was unable to get through her line. She looked extremely shagged and sick that as if she would fall down anytime. Nevertheless, she was still as helpful.

I had a long wait at the bus interchange for bus 167. After reaching home, I finished up the remaining food for my lunch and started bathing. Then, I took MRT to Kovan to meet up with Kaven. His sister, Fui Yen, caught me at the door of Heartland Mall and I was very glad that she still remembered me. I got to meet their mum and later, Kaven joined us after buying his drinks.

It was only near 7pm, which was an hour away from the arranged time. Kaven’s mum wanted to go up to the Hougang flat immediately and I was quite lost. I called Kelly and got Rina’s number from her and tried to see if Rina could arrange to let us go up earlier. I was lectured by Kelly for she said I was supposed to control the situation. Nevertheless, I did my part to ring up Rina who told me the owners were inconvenient to let us go up earlier.

The worst came while we were approaching Kaven’s car, for he and his sister had a tiff. I was not worried about my commission but the sudden cancellation of the second viewing of the flat in jus less than an hour’s time. We paused at a car park for some time before proceeding to the flat. I did not understand their language on the car but I felt so awkward to sit in their family’s dispute. It kept my head spinning.

Luckily, Kelly had reached there earlier to wait for us. I had quite awkward encounter when Kaven’s mum asked me about why Maybank was not giving any gift. I explained to her that its interest rate was lower than other banks and that could be the reason why they were not giving away any freebies. Then, his mum told me she had just bought a house in Malaysia and the bank offered zero commission for the first year. I became quite wary of his mum for I was afraid to give any wrong answer to her questions.

We did most of the documents at the void deck while waiting for the time to pass. Rina arrived at 8pm and we went up together. It was the third visit there and both Kaven and I loved the place. We stayed there to finish up the documents after Kaven and his family decided to buy it. Suimin called me twice to ask me for translation again when my mind was in chaos and was actually busy with the documentations.

After that, we went to the coffee shop across the street while waiting for Kelly to photocopy their identification cards. I did not buy any food for I was having headache. Kelly returned for the second time to let me sign some documents. Kaven was booked for parking his car outside the rubbish dump collecting place and was fined hundred bucks. He sent his mum and sister home before dropping me at my house.

The fact that I had to either get a part time job or switch to a better company troubled me and that could be the source of my illness. I would probably wait till finishing the course at my company before deciding on anytime. That was five months after joining the company, they finally got the course up and I wondered how many cheated people would attend the course for I believed many of them had already gotten themselves other jobs.

First Open Market’s Transaction

[Sunday, 04 March, 2007]

I began feeling worse and almost felt like dropping down onto the floor. The cough was irritating. However, as time passed by, I began to feel better.

I was waked up a number of times in the morning. Two hours after I dozed off at around 6am, my mum unintentionally and stupidly disturbed my sleep just to switch on the fan. Afterwards, my elder brother’s girlfriend came and they made so much noise and followed by phone calls.

I got up at around noon finally after Jingkun told me we were going to meet at 1.45pm. I could not finish my lunch and was eventually late for fifteen minutes. However, I had totally forgotten I was meeting the BMCC guys and I had to be late for an hour in order to match up with the latest comer. Jingkun’s girlfriend cocked up the day for us and eventually I went to Mingen’s house with only Meijun and Weitat.

Mingfa was already waiting there for us. Mingen’s house was big and nice and his mum was very friendly. I stayed until Wilson arrived and left with Mingfa to Hougang. Luckily I dropped Kaven a message for he thought the meeting was called off. Mingfa and I took bus to Choa Chu Kang MRT and finally reached Ang Mo Kio by train. Afterwards, we took bus 88 to Street 61.

Kaven reached there just before us and Suimin called me up when we were reaching. She was asking me about outputting Chinese in her computer. She was behaving weirdly like an insane somehow. This day, she turned into a tortoise.

This was the first time I experienced signing of OTP other than JTC flats’. Later on, I gave a call to Ruoci but she did not really sound like wanting to meet up and thus I followed Kaven home. I joined in the steamboat with his tenant and her friend. Then, I went for a swim with him and afterwards, got to meet up with his another two friends – Eric and Rina. By the side of the pool when I was shivering, I did not say many things and mainly it was because I did not want to say anything which Kaven did not want to announce yet.

Later on, he sent me to the Clementi MRT station and I managed to reach home at around 11pm.