Live Happily for Your Loved Ones

I almost missed the news that Huiting’s dad had passed away. It happened that I went out for photoshoot and did not scroll through my Facebook news feed. On the second day, Ahpa texted me and I felt very guilty for not been there to show prompt concern for the kindest girl I ever knew. Both of us went down but we did not get to talk to her much. After that, I showed Ahpa to the beautiful Henderson Waves. We planned to go over during the last night of the wake with Yonghao to do night photoshoot and then accompany Huiting throughout the night.

On the actual day, Jade went down early. I joined her straight from Tiong Bahru after meet-up with my gang. I had fun shooting Huiting’s cute niece and nephew with my camera. Huiting asked me to take photos of the entire event and I was totally lost as it was weird. Another relative of hers did the job. Ahpa changed her mind of staying overnight since she had to work on the next day but she still came down
at late hour with Yonghao as to wait for the lorry. We had the usual fun of crapping around and I enjoyed the companionship of the innocent people. Yonghao was the kind man who sent bimbo, Ahpa and I home.

Huiting was totally fine in her usual strong self. She did no self pity and faced life bravely.

What I have learnt during the few days are:

1. We should not trust social media to deliver all important news as not everyone log in daily. With the flooding of non-essential information, it is easy to miss out important news as well. If you need any help or listening ears urgently, call me directly.

2. If you want to do something good, just do it. Ever since Huiting’s dad was sick, I wanted to get her family and friends out for a small gathering, probably at Henderson Waves, and help them to take some family photos. It was a long dragged idea that did not surface out until the funeral, I confessed to Ahpa about my regret. Partly, it was due to my lack of photography skill that I had remained conserve about the idea.

3. I need to organise my time better. Before the first night that I went over, Ahpa had told me that Shengyang was not feeling well and had stayed awake the night before. I wanted to get some herbal tea for him but my timing was too packed since I had to meet my relatives for dinner. The idea was to treat Huiting’s boyfriend good so that he could take better care of her.

We should try to live our lives without regret…

Jingkun’s Visit to My Office

Mei Hoe hurried me home from her mum-in-law’s wake. I was quite worried that her husband would have to stay awake by himself. When she told me that outsiders should not stay behind, I felt like telling her that I was already half her god son and thus should not be considered as outsider. I left at around 1am and walked very fast that it took me only nearly twenty minutes to reach home.

I took my supper, which was the leftover curry, together with bread. I was very tired and went to bed at 3am.

I woke up after 9am and went to the office two hours later. I did fourteen chin-ups, which was one less than the day before. I was alone in the office and felt very tired throughout. I was not sure if it was due to the melatonin or my own health. I was working on the tuition agency’s administration pages before Jingkun came over and we had a long chat.

I reached home at 8.30pm and fed Lucky before taking dinner and continuing with my work. Lucky disturbed me as usual.


Chalet, Wake and Boon Lay Drive Show Flat

[Sunday, January 28, 2007]

My family and Ivy’s siblings had a little good time at the barbecue pit. It was the first time I had marshmallow with chocolate and melting it above the heat gave wonderful sensation upon reaching the mouth.

My brother’s friends were playing mahjong while the rest of us were at the room. After the long and exhausting day, I was shagged, partially due to the breakfast at evening. As I was drained and had to work for the next day, I did not hesitate to sleep before them.

I woke up a few times in the morning and finally when my brothers brought MacDonald’s breakfast over. It was not a good breakfast for I was almost frozen and too cold to enjoy it. Then, I had my bath and never wanted to part with the warm water.

It was another walk towards Jurong East MRT alone. I was late for a while but luckily did not delay them. Junrong and Huimin were already waiting at the bus-stop and all of us went into the church together. By then, I realised so many people did not go so I roughly guessed the next year would be worse. Mrs Ng’s cries at the end of the session were very saddening.

We went to West Mall’s Pastamania and I camped there with them while waiting for Mingfa to get ready. My stomach was floated somehow and was feeling very terrible. I took bus 174 by the main road but missed the bus-stop that I had to walk over from Jurong Point to Boon Lay Drive. I had a very frustrated afternoon.

Living room

Sofa in living room

Dining table in living room

Room for 2 persons

Room for 2 persons

Room for 1 person

Room for 1 person

Living room

Living room



I met up with Mingfa soon and saw how the show flat was beautifully designed. Jolee came back later and taught us things. She was a nice lady.

After 6pm, we left the place and both Mingfa and I walked to Jurong Point. He met his friend there and later Wilson and Weitat arrived. At the box office, Meijun had already arrived. They wanted to catch a show but I decided not to join them since I was so sleepy, hungry and broke. Sadly, they did not even have time for dinner with me before going into the theatre.

I went home alone, dozing off right after sitting down on the train. As I was crossing the field towards my house, I met my mum and younger brother. They were going to Plaza Singapura to get something as well as for dinner. I was so tired that I decided not to waste my transportation fee again and went home directly instead.

Paying respect to Yongming’s grandfather

[Friday, 25 August, 2006]

It was another disappointment when I could not get people down to Yongming’s grandfather’s wake. Out of the class of over ten people, I contacted those who I was closer to but in the end only Wen Chang could make it. The weird thing was that Yongming had only told me about it and he did not even inform Lynn. I betted if he had told the rest personally, they would make more efforts to go.

We met up at around 1815h and poor him had reached there much earlier right after work. I also sacrificed my time with Vivi when I could have accompanied her longer. The worst thing was that I was unable to send her home as I had to rush over to meet up with Ah Chang.

I met Xiao Hua at Lot 1’s door but we did not get to chat for long since Ah Chang soon arrived. Then, Ah Chang and I proceeded on to find Yongming.

I was just ready for the little buffet dinner. There were satays but I supposed they would those heated up in oven ones. Yongming’s friend was there and we sat together in the same table. I could not get used to the three of them speaking in English.

The embarrassing part was when we handed the condolence money to Yongming, since Ah Chang was shortage of four bucks and I had to pay for Lynn and Benson’s first, I had to squeeze out two one-dollar coins to fit the forty bucks. Since I had messaged the rest about the condolence money on the same invitation message and they did not tell me about paying, I took it that they were not interested to pay.

We left as his ritual started after setting up a few tables for him.

The fun kids and the gathering at funeral

Last Friday, I did not go home straight after booking out. I had my dinner alone at Long John Silver, upsizing my drink to the largest cup. I sat there waiting for Bianhong while updating my diary.

Bianhong arrived after seven with his girlfriend and we set off to his grand dad’s funeral. We passed by Sem’s house and it was just somewhere further in.

I had actually been to the house before years ago, there were still some short captures inside my mind, After Bianhong bathed, we went down together.

I almost could not recognise his mum. His eldest sister, Wanyi, reminded me of Tiffany, whereas Wanting looked alike. Wanying, same as her elder sister, could not recognise me anymore. It was quite sad for a few years back both of them were always clinging to me.

Bianhong had many other cousins there and they were so cute that I was quite reluctant to leave. We crapped around and they often ganged up to bully me. They made me remove my watch like as if I was part of their family and even complained about the colours of my shirt.

Alvin Cheong went as well and followed by Chuanjie, Sichun, Junrong, Weixiong and another guy not to be mentioned. It was kind of a gathering, especially rare to see Weixiong around. However, I spent a lot of time folding the incest papers instead to try to impress the kids.

That early morning, I wanted to stay to accompany Bianhong as well as to play with the cuties. However, I was totally unprepared as Bianhong had only informed me when I was staying overnight in camp on Thursday night. The most important reasons were that I had a haircut appointment hours later and also the swimming outing with Gilbert, Chua, Weichuan and Kenny.

I really appreciated Alvin Cheong for sending me home, else I would have to take a cab with double charge instead.

A year has passed

Morning was to meet up with the GESS volleyballers to attend Mr Ng’s memorial for his first year death anniversary.

I didn’t sleep early of course, but managed to wake up in time. I took the train to Bukit Batok MRT and met Jinyang there, who looked like an Ah Beng, kind of beyond recogization. After calling him several times, he didn’t look up and I had to sound his handphone to make sure I wasn’t seeing his long lost twin brother.

We waited for Sichun who came with Tze Long and then met up with the twins and some of the juniors in secondary four. I couldn’t recognise most of them but my ex teammates seemed to know them well and I felt I was in a different world.

We took bus 852 (should be) to St. Mary church, where we “rushed” (Sichun was doing more of the running) into the place while the ceremony was near to begin.

I didn’t like all the songs. Pardon me but I felt if you were to memorialize someone, you shouldn’t sing praises of something else. Whatever. At least I had to show some respect.

I wasn’t supposed to feel sad anymore. The timing wasn’t just right. I didn’t know why the day reminded me more of the inter-formation game which I wasn’t allowed to take part in. I became quieter. The cough hit me more and rode me to devastation.

One thing I couldn’t understand was why Mr Ng’s son wasn’t present. He used to dote on this unfilial son, even brought him down for the GESS volleyball camp, who acted big shot. Maybe I wasn’t in position to judge whose fault it was, but What foe could they have? After his death, everything should be buried.

I heard that this spoilt child wasn’t staying with his mum anymore. She rented a whole house outside for him when he didn’t want to stay with her. How ridiculous it was.

If you don’t have the capability, keep your egoistic; if you can’t afford, don’t get it; if you don’t respect someone, don’t seek help from her. Insensible I must say.

Anyway, the secondary four juniors didn’t join us while we embarked to West Mall for a little light lunch at KFC. The chicken quality was way worse than years ago, and at first I thought it happened only for some branches but I realised they were all the same.

Then, we went Orchard for a walk, taking bus 106 from the inter-change and Mrs Ng dropped at Clementi. The guys including me and the girls were sitting so far away. Then, we parted at Orchard when the girls were going to Far East Plaza. I thought it was a good gathering but it ended up this way that we were divided into groups and separated.

The remaining of us (the guys) joined up with Chuanjie and took a walk around Takashimaya. Junrong bought a pair of Adidas shoes for around $150 and soon we bid each other goodbye.

A different Chinese New Year Eve it was.

Anthony’s dad’s funeral

I was supposed to go home early to upload my website with all the updated stuffs which I’d done over the weekends, however, I failed to.

During the gym session with Bryan and Sem Chi, I received this SMS from my brother, saying Anthony’s dad had passed away. I told him the time I was booking out in the evening but he didn’t reply after that.

As mentioned by Bryan, people go to the gym for different purposes. Like him, he trained to make himself look nicer, whereas others tried to make themselves fitter; for Sem and I, we were just doing it as physiotherapy. I was so lazy that I didn’t really like to go to the gym, since volleyball could help keep me fit as well, but for the sake of my recovery I had to.

When I was leaving the camp, I gave my brother a call to confirm the meeting time and place, and he told me he wasn’t going anymore. Since I might not be able to leave the camp before nightfall the next day, I decided to proceed on alone.

I strolled towards Anthony’s house with Edgar, who stayed further down, and we’d some craps on the way talking about seeing girls. Anthony couldn’t see my face when I waved across the road.

His dad passed away on Monday due to heart attack. There wasn’t any symptom before that, just plainly minor illness like fever. Like most of the funerals I’d attended, there wasn’t any crying; adults were supposed to act brave.

I was dead beat as I hadn’t slept enough for the past few days as usual. There wasn’t much for me to say, especially when I didn’t know his friends. As more of them arrived, I became more awkward, finding difficulty in understanding their conversations. They just made me so inferior. From games, movies, stars to scouts and other topics, there was too little I knew to give any constructive or even humorous remarks, that I stayed in low profile.

They were great men, the old boys from my secondary school, Gan Eng Seng School, the ex scouts of great leaderships and fames. I could have gained so much if I’d joined them years back, if only I didn’t hate uniform groups.

The interesting thing was that they ate the peanuts like chocolates. I betted they were hungry like me but was too shy to take any food. I sat there stoning for more than five hours before they all decided to leave. One of them drove a few of home and luckily for that, I could reach home earlier near midnight.

Death of his kin

Going out with my colleagues were great, except for the wrong purpose. Yongcai’s father passed away a few days ago and we went to attend the funeral.

At least he has two elder brothers who are already fetching money home, while he’s serving the national with the low allowance each month. I mean he’s better off me, because my father passed away with lung cancer when I was in secondary three. My elder brother was sixteen then and my younger one was only eleven. Since then, I’ve been trying hard not to get upset over anything. Though I’ve failed umpteen times, the experiences have frozen my heart more.

Anyway, after the busy day, I didn’t catch the rest on the shuttle bus. I alighted and thought they had boarded the train, so I rushed up. My phone’s battery was drying off after the long day’s work. I finally switched it on but was too late. I met up with Rueben and took a walk down to find Chua at Jurong East.

Chua was a weird guy, because normally my friends wouldn’t want to trouble others, whereas he insisted Rueben to get him a packet of ice tea after we made a big round of search in vain. This time he pointed to us the direction. Though it was a bit far away, I was in luck upon crossing over the road. However, I was looking around the place and by the time I looked in front, a cute girl passed by, we had walked past each other. I sensed she was looking at us somehow. Anyway the coffee shop was quite far away and I made a wrong choice by purchasing the $1.20 can drink there since I could get it much cheaper at a vending machine.

We went back to sit down. Chua seemed fine to us. We couldn’t expect him to cry anyway, I understood his situation well, that he would most probably weep when nobody was around. Funerals in Singapore weren’t like in the movies where you could hear cries throughout the days.

As the rest arrived by bus, namely Fredrick, Ivan and Tze Siang, we had a great gathering. They were kind, fun and entertaining. We gossiped like aunties in the market and time passed by fast. Suddenly I saw Chua Kao Sai and I realised Yongcai and him were relatives. We had a chat about BMCC and PJC before the sky turned dark, we left for our dinner at IMM. I wasn’t feeling that great in my smelly uniform at crowded places.

I had made a fool out of myself a few times by saying “MMI” (Military Medical Institute) instead of IMM since I was always going to MMI for physiotherapy sessions. Anyway the Long John Silver’s place was almost full and we couldn’t get any seat, thus decided to cross over to JEC (Jurong Entertainment Centre). I wasn’t supportive of the idea since IMM was bigger and definitely had more babes to look at.

The Long John Silver’s at JEC was definitely a low rated place for its poor service. We waited for more than ten minutes for all the food to be served over to our table. I would never classify it as a fast food restaurant.

Set aside the food, our conversations went on again. We talked about the upcoming Jianwei’s chalet and the Red house at Pasir Ris. I could feel the innocence of everyone and too bad I didn’t have my camera with me. I seemed to be the quietest guy there but it was really entertaining to listen to him. We sat there for quite long and finally parted after nine. Everyone went separate ways except for Ivan who stayed close to me and we crapped so much in the train that I couldn’t stop laughing.