If only I could forget, if only I could let go, you’ll be happier.
It seemed a normal beach outing and yet it was so special for him as it was the first time he saw Nicole. She was so sweet and hyperactive. Apart from these, she was just somehow special to him.
He couldn’t keep his eyes off her for she was unique. He aimed his camera at her many times. Sweet, cute, sexy, charisma, there wasn’t enough vocabulary to describe her beauty.
He was pleased to see her and her friends going for dinner with his?after going to the beach. They went Orchard Seoul garden to celebrate in advance for his and another girl’s birthday. However, Nicole sat at another table, which was further away.
They were taking pictures and all he wanted was to take with his sweet fairy but she left early without bidding goodbye to him.
The next Friday after his work, Nicole and her friends joined him for lunch at Marina Square’s Long John Silver. Nicole melted his heart with all her movements and her voice seduced him.
The next day, he went to wait for Nicole and her friends outside their school with some friends. They went World Trade centre together and then to beach.
That beach outing caused great impact on him. He asked her to pretend to feed him with watermelon on a spoon and she did it without hesitating. They posed and took a picture. All he thought was just acting but she was putting the watermelon into his mouth.
They had dinner at the hawker centre at World Trade Centre. He could have taken the same bus as her and he might be able to see her home. He wasn’t brave enough to speak up.
They started chatting online the next day in IRC. They exchanged numbers after a great chat. She told him a pervert had followed her home the previous day after their dinner and she promised to allow him to send her home the next time.
Into midnight, she went offline and gave him a SMS. They started to exchange SMS and they made promises. He promised her a rose for Valentines’ Day and she promised him a date on Valentines’ Day, massage for him and to call him often.
At night, they had their 1st phone chat together and he was so pleased. They made promises again. She was to accompany him during Christmas Eve and he owed her a Christmas present. She even agreed to go his house to massage for him on the coming Friday because he had to go back to work on Saturday and couldn’t go to the beach.
When he was working, they exchanged SMS and she even apologised for replying him late. They were mushy at their words. She was at Downtown East and she asked him to join her after work. He told her he would try.
He was all out to meet his little fairy. He was annoyed for being released late from his work. He rushed home, bathed and left to seek for his happiness.
It was so crazy of him for he had to go back to work the next morning. He hated to go out alone at night and that chalet wasn’t her class chalet. He was more worried over her safety because she would be hanging out on the streets at night.
He was disappointed to see her gang there. His plan for the romantic night slipped away. As her friend held on to his arm when they were roller-blading, he was so irritated.
They went to the Costa Sand chalet and entered when the few female owners of the chalet weren’t presented. Both of them lay on the mattress side by side to watch television show.
They commented on the old show and he was filled with happiness. He took her handphone and read the SMS. Most of her messages were from a guy and they were rubbish. One of the SMS was “I love you” throughout.
He got to know that she had just broken up with her boyfriend a month ago through her conversation with her friends. She couldn’t get over him still and was yearning so much that he would call her again. Whenever her handphone rang, she was so anxious.
They went to the pool and lay down. He was sitting near her when she asked him to lie beside her. They gazed at the stars together and the stars watched him sinking in deeper in the river of love.
In the morning, he asked her to go to the NTUC chalet to buy some food. His plan almost succeeded when one of her friends tagged along. Nicole complained how tired she was and she looked sleepy. He wanted so much to carry her but he didn’t want to risk being rejected.
He bought two bottles of alcoholic drinks for the two girls. He wouldn’t have done so in the past but this time he didn’t want to reject his fairy. She promised him they wouldn’t get drunk. They went back to the chalet after he finished his instant noodle.
Before sunrise, they set off to the bus-stop. The four girls fell asleep all over while waiting for the 1st bus. He spent most of his time staring at Nicole. After he left, she SMS him to apologize for making him stay up the whole night.
Ever since, her SMS replies were slow. Sometimes she didn’t even reply him. He was sad. He thought she was tired after the chalet but he was wrong.
He was released from work during lunchtime and he was told to wait for phone call before going to work the next day. The next day, he received a call from the lady in-charge in the evening, asking him to return to work the next day. He was furious for Nicole was supposed to keep him accompany that day.
He went to work, but was released so early again and he felt so stupid. He quickly SMS Nicole and she replied him slow. She told him she didn’t want to go out. The sad thing was that her cartoon show was more important than him.
At night, he tried to seek permission to see her home the next day, which was a Saturday. She had an outing at East Coast Park. At 1st she allowed him, but soon she changed her mind.
He had a busy day at work the next day and after that he took a cab to join his gang. He passed by East Coast Park and they exchanged SMS. He asked her to join him for steamboat at Marina South but she had excuses. When he saw her SMS that she was thrown into the water by two of her friend’s male friends, he was dejected.
He was quiet during dinner. He didn’t drink nor eat anything. In the end, he took some food so as to entertain his friends.
The next week, he had a chat with her over the phone for three days. The 4th day when he finally built up his courage to call her, she was on phone with another guy. She asked him whom should she talk to and he chose to put down the phone.
He dreamt of her on that coming Sunday. They went for steamboat in a big group after training. His friends arranged for him to sit beside her and he helped foot her bill.
They had a game of sucking up the ice with straw and passing to another person using straw as well. Nicole lost and owed him a kiss but she was reluctant to return him. After some persuasion, she promised to pose kissing him for photo taking. However, their friends pushed the two of them together suddenly.
He was happy but he preferred her to do it on her free will. Her friend told him she would start to avoid him after the kiss and he was sad. They went to play pool and borrowed his I/C.
Nicole left with her friends and he wanted so much to send her home. He didn’t know what to do with his I/C at the counter and they still wanted to continue with their game.
In the end, they urged him to go after her and he ran towards the bus-stop in the rain. He almost slipped 3 times in his slipper. He met up with a few of his friends at the bus-stop and he decided to rush to the MRT station to try his luck.
He SMS Nicole’s friend to stall time and when he reached, he couldn’t find them. He was disappointed and he sat alone there to wait for the rest. He was quiet on the way home.
He SMS her to ask her why she didn’t want to return him the kiss and she replied him that there were too many people around. She didn’t reply him again. He dreamt of her the next day.
A few days later, they chatted in IRC. He asked her if 1 day he was to ignore her, what she would do. She answered, “like that lor, nevermind lor.” He realized he meant nothing to her.
They went to a friend’s house the next day. He didn’t talk to her for the whole day except glanced at her secretly. He kept himself inside the room. Some of them thought he had fallen asleep for they didn’t know what had happened.
Nicole left soon and some of them accompanied her. He looked down the window and stared at her walking away from his heart.
They went to the beach the next day straight from his friend’s house. Nicole and her friends went as well. He didn’t talk to her again. She lay on the sand under the shelter and slept. He wanted so much to talk to her but he couldn’t brave himself up, nor could he accept the fact that he was nothing to her.
They had dinner at the hawker centre again. Before she went off, she said bye to him. They had phone calls but they didn’t talk during outings.
1 month after they got to know each other, the group of them went to a friend’s chalet at Downtown East NTUC. He wanted to send her home but she had rejected him earlier by SMS. He tried to avoid Nicole and started to play volleyball with his friend.
Suddenly his friends called him and told him they were leaving. He went to join them and they told him Nicole agreed to let him send her home with another friend. It seemed stupid and obviously she wouldn’t ask him to send her home.
The next day after work, his gang was with Nicole near his workplace. He went to meet them and Nicole left with her gang. The rest of them went Lau Pa Sat for dinner.
He was sad. He took beer with his friends and he started to vomit on the way home. They sat on the floor on their way to the MRT station and even lay down.
Nicole was going China for a holiday the next day. He asked her for the time to meet her but she didn’t seem to be keen to let him know. He went airport with his gang early to wait for her and told her to call him when she arrived.
He held on to his handphone to wait for his fairy but his friend borrowed and played with the voice recorder. His friend took it and went far away to record his own singing. He was so anxious that Nicole would call him any time.
He SMS her but she seemed pissed off. When they walked to the departure hall after some time, they saw her. She looked nice in her dressing. Busy chatting on phone, she didn’t seem to bother them.
He felt stupid and whenever he tried to talk to her alone, she walked towards the crowd. He took many pictures of his fairy.
When Nicole was about to set off, his friend handed her a packet of sweet, nicely wrapped. He was stunned and he had never realized she was closer to his friends than him. He had thought for the whole afternoon and couldn’t come up with sweets, which was her favorite.
After she left, he didn’t open his mouth. They took bus to his friend’s house to stay overnight. He followed them downstairs for supper but he didn’t take any food or drink.
9 days later, he stayed overnight at another friend’s house who lived near the airport. They overslept and missed the flight. He called her in the morning when he woke up but she wasn’t interested in talking.
Then he realized his gang had organized a KTV session with Nicole. He went to meet Nicole’s friend and waited for her at Payar Lebar MRT station. After some time, she told her friend she had overslept.
They went Apollo centre and throughout, they didn’t talk to each other. They went Lau Pa Sat at night and she sat beside him. The silence resumed and he started to drink.
His face was reddish and then he started to talk to Nicole. His good friend pulled him to another side and had a chat. He started to cry.
4 days later, she probably used her sister’s handphone to SMS him that her handphone was damaged. He had heard about it from his friends a few days ago.
He started to avoid going out with his friends as to prevent spoiling their moods. However, he asked Nicole’s friend out 1 day to buy her Christmas present as promised. After that he went home. During evening, he went to the MRT station to pass the present to Nicole’s friend.
That Christmas Eve’s evening, Nicole SMS him to thank him for the present but he didn’t reply. He rarely switched on his handphone as well.
After midnight, he SMS her to wish her Merry Christmas. She told him she was feeling down and was outside the movie theater. She asked him to go join them. She told him they would meet him at the entrance of Suntec city after the movie had ended.
He took a cab over and waited outside the cinema. He realized they were at Orchard after making some phone call. He was told to go Quay Quake to find other people 1st.
He finally got to see his fairy and they talked for a while. He wanted to know why she was depressed but she didn’t want to tell him even though she had promised earlier to tell. She told him it was because of her mum and he can’t do anything except to believe.
They went Lau Pa Sat again and this time someone bought alcoholic drink for her from a 7-11 shop. He didn’t stop Nicole because he thought she had a bottle at the chalet and nothing happened.
This time he was wrong. She got drunk and was spitting nonsense. He was extremely sad. He was so worried for her walking on the road without looking out for cars.
They walked to One Fullerton and sat by the seaside. Two of their friends walked extremely slow and failed to catch up. After explaining the direction, the two of them still couldn’t figure it out even though they were just nearby.
Another friend of his took his handphone to look for the two lost friends. At this point of time, Nicole’s mum called and she had to rush home by taking a cab. He wanted to accompany her but his handphone wasn’t with him.
He walked her to the roadside and helplessly watched her board the cab in her reddish face. He sat alone by the roadside for more than half an hour. He was so worried that her mum would discover she was drunk.
He got back his handphone and SMS her immediately. He threatened her not to take any alcoholic drink and he told his friends not to buy any for her in future. After he got home, he dreamt of her again.
The next day when his friend went out with her to KTV again, he didn’t go. They didn’t really call him along as well.
A day later, which was a Saturday, he went down her school to play volleyball. Nicole and her friend met up with him and his friend to go to the beach together after that. He didn’t talk to her again.
There were too many people waiting for the bus to get out of Sentosa that evening and they walked out. They had dinner at the hawker centre nearby and they went to the bus-stop. On the bus, he SMS her to ask her to take care of herself. She didn’t reply him.
3 days later, on New Year Eve, they had another outing. He was happy as well as sad to see her along. They didn’t talk again. They went to a pub owned by her friend’s father. He was alone most of the time, trying to avoid her.
They went to Suntec City and then to Esplanade. After that, they walked to Raffles?Place to wait for another friend. Nicole was nowhere to be seen with another friend of his. He was depressed. His friends were teasing Nicole with that male friend of his that night, ignoring his feeling.
They went to Lau Pa Sat for supper again. This time, he shared a jug of beer with 1 friend. He was giddy but he bought another 2 bottles of alcoholic drinks from the 7-11 shop. This time he was extremely drunk.
Nicole wanted to take some alcoholic drink as well but he snatched it over from her and shouted at her. He was sad for doing that. On the way he ran about and kicked around.
He finally vomited many times at One Fullerton. Nobody spotted his tears inside his eyes. He lay down many times and he was looking for his fairy.
After sunrise, he was alright but somehow weak. Nicole seemed to be sick and she vomited. She seemed to have taken some alcoholic drink. He wanted to send her home but he was rejected again. He entrusted his friend to send her home instead.
He went to her school for volleyball again and after that they met in canteen. She chatted with his friends except him.
Another week later, he went there to play as well but this time he hurried home as to not see her. She SMS him in the afternoon and asked if he was going out to celebrate for her friend’s birthday. He replied he didn’t want to spoil their fun and he went to watch his junior play friendly match instead.
During the New Year period, they went to his friend’s house to “bai nian”. She was extremely sexy. She started to talk to him again but they didn’t chat for long.
He was always shy to sing during KTV session but this time it was different. He got drunk slowly and started to sing out loudly.
He dreamt of her 2 days later and on the next Sunday after training, his teammates went orchard to meet up with Nicole and her friends. He went with them but took another bus to go home upon alighting from the first bus.
Before Valentine’s Day, he remembered he owed her a rose. He told her friend to help him buy and gave her. The whole gang went out to celebrate together but he stayed at home.
A week before the March school holidays, they had a chalet. His 1st night was ruined after hearing her name. He was quiet after that but eventually he tried to forget about it.
The 2nd evening, she arrived for the BBQ. His noisiness ended soon and he kept himself busy at his laptop. When his friend borrowed it, he hid under the blanket to pretend sleepy.
He couldn’t hold out anymore, he joined his friend to play volleyball and refused to take any food.
As Nicole was leaving, she asked if he wanted to send her to the bus-stop. His friend suggested him to give her a ride but she refused. He didn’t want it either as he was in a very weak state because he didn’t take any food.
She walked with a female friend while he and his friend ride the bicycle slowly. He was strengthless and with his mindful of thoughts, he almost fell off a few times. They took a very long time to get to the bus-stop.
She was talking to her new friend on the way and seemed never notice about his existence. Before she boarded the bus, she said she should have brought her tuition stuffs along so that she could stay.
After Nicole had left, he was filled with energy somehow. Maybe it was because he had managed to talk to her.
After midnight, he sent her a SMS to apologize for his attitude and he told her he couldn’t change it. He went to the beach alone to see the sunrise and it was around that point of time when she replied him. He didn’t realize it only until hours later.
Around two weeks later, they went beach again and the silence continued. Even during the dinner at the hawker centre, he didn’t talk to her.
Two weeks later, they celebrated for their friend’s belated birthday at KTV again. She arrived suddenly and he was quiet as usual. They took photos outside the KTV and he watched them from far.
He was extremely sad. He knew all of his friends were close to her except him. The group of them who were taking photos walked slowly. They lost in contact and he and some friends waited outside. He was fed up.
They went to Boat Quay for dinner. She went over to sit beside him suddenly. He was happy but he knew someone had asked her over because he was quiet. Somehow he felt she was taking pity on him.
After the dinner, he walked with them to the MRT station but he went off after reaching. He walked home by himself and the past flashed through his mind.
He received her SMS to tell him that she was happy that night. He was frank and he told her not to take pity on him. She seemed to be pushing him to another girl as well and he felt like a thrash.
It was more than a month later, he saw to his disappointment once again. From her IRC quit message, he knew she had taken a fancy on someone. Her previous message since he 1st knew her was that she enjoyed her single life.
He knew it was due to his incapability that led to his failure. He made up his mind to forget her, forget about her beauty and all her empty promises.
He finally ended his misery after more than half a year. Since then he told himself he wouldn’t give a damn to any girl who didn’t appreciate him.